Today was a long day. For me at least. You know, 10 hours is a long day for me. Unlike Simon in the next cube who was at work for 14 hours. We're trying to get all the current bugs fixed for the 3.1.2 release of our software. So we have until Friday morning and I have 2 bugs and 1 design flaw to help fix. So this is what I'll be spending the next couple of days doing.

I finally registered my E-Trade account. This account is for my Employee Stock Purchase Plan (ESPP) and the Stock Options I've been given. Now that I entered my stock information in Quicken I realize that I currently have some $32000 in company stock, at current market prices. Compared to the $11000 I have in 401K, this is a large amount of money to have in one com- pany's stock, even if it is my company.

Anyway, I logged into my E-Trade account and changed the intro- ductory password, something I should have done last December. Then I looked around a bit, realized that I could really use that money to pay off my credit card (or perhaps buy a cool Lombard PowerBook :-), and I submitted a trade to sell $12000 of stock. Now we'll see if I get the check by US Mail ok.

Now I feel better. After tax withholdings I should still be able to pay off my credit cards, leaving me with $10000 in debt, mostly to my family. I realize that I live a rather irresponsible life-style and that I do spend a lot of money on myself and others (for example, I bought dinner tonight for the four of us in my group who were there at 23:00). And I do try to keep up this carefree facade.

But sometimes I do get worried that I'm too irresponsible. Sometimes the debts worry me and get me down. Selling the stock is a calculated move. I'd make significantly more money by not selling my stock, or selling and buying more stock, compared to the interest on my debts. But there is something about taking responsibility and paying off my debts. I'll still be a long way off, but closer than I have been in a couple of years.

So now, if the growing rumors that my team will be reorged out of my group are true, should I leave my company? That's a lot of money I'd be leaving behind. I don't want to be that way, that money should affect me doing what I feel is right. But I have some 4600 options valued today at over $100000, although I won't be fully vested for another 3.5 years. Me being the kind of person who doesn't get paid highly, that's a lot of money.

Anyway, if I do leave I don't know what I'd do. I don't want to be a contractor or consultant, that's too mercenary for me. I would like to work with my best friend once before I die, which may not be as far away as I'd like to think. Once again, I'm worrying myself too much, for once. I'll know more Thursday, then I'll think about what to do.

It's already 03:15, I've only been home about 2.5 hours. And I'll probably be up a while longer watching my tapes. Got to get back to work soon enough and figure out the flaws in the code changes I wrote today. But I need to unwind some more before getting back to the salt mines.