It's been two days and I think I've calmed down enough to write about it. At 08:45 EDT on September 11, a hijacked jetliner crashed into New York's World Trade Center's north tower. Twenty minutes later, another jetliner crashed into a second WTC tower. Another half hour later, a third jetliner crashed into the Pentagon. A fourth jetliner crashed in Pennsylvania, away from populated areas. Both WTC towers, the two highest, were totally destroyed. Part of the Pentagon was destroyed. Over 4000 people missing, most probably dead. The largest and most destructive terrorist attack in history.

I woke up early that day, before 09:00. I wanted to watch "Live with Regis and Kelly", which I almost always miss since it's on so early. Instead I saw Peter Jennings of ABC News going over the developing tragedy. It took a few minutes for the news to penetrate my sleepy head. Then it was shock. Video footage showing the carnage, the President vowing revenge, all the airports closed, buildings evacuated, San Francisco government shut down, schools closed. Too much information.

Pick left a message at around 09:30. Telling me to turn on the news and giving his capsule summary. He ended by warning me to stay off of the Bay Bridge. I ate breakfast and hit the web. Everyone was talking about it, web sites had little messages. Even the television stations were either showing their own news or news from some other channel, or were off air with a message to watch another channel for news. Only the Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon had normal programming, though that makes sense as I wouldn't want my kids watching the news at a time like this.

I thought about not going to work. It was so depressing. Then I thought "this is exactly what the terrorists want". They want to shock and scare us, to panic the people of the United States of America. I wasn't going to be party to that, by Goddess. I'm going to work and I'm going to do my job. For that is the best way to help. Gosh, there weren't that many people on the road. About half is my estimate. But when I got to work the parking lot was pretty full, though those would be filled first in any case -- perhaps the parking garages were empty.

When I got to work only Simon and Aravind were around, everyone else in the group had either left or not come at all. That's because Pick told everyone to stay at home today. It's great that he's always looking out for us. But since I was here I might as well do my job and soon I was the only one in the group left. There were lots of other people around working. Not that I got a lot done, but a little bit at least. QA called wondering if there were any developers left to help them, since I was the only one here I got the duty and did the best I could.

I went home early. Once again only light traffic. CalTrans had stopped all road construction. San Francisco International Airport was closed. Baseball games had been cancelled. Once I got home the news wasn't any better. Shock and dismay throughout the country. A certain amount of fear because people didn't know who was responsible. If you can't see the enemy, that can be pretty frightening. Stories of heroism, people plunging in to help and save others, ending up dying when the first WTC tower collapsed. Flight 93, where the passengers knew that another jetliner had crashed into the WTC, they fought the hijackers and stopped them, but at the cost of their own lives too. People calling loved ones on their cell phones, trapped in the WTC towers or on airplanes, knowing that they were going to die.

At the end of the day I wondered how this would change the country. I hope, fervently so, that we won't change. That we won't let other people dictate to us. We must keep doing what we've been doing. And if we do, then in that way we will have won. But I also had another thought at the end of the day: someone is going to pay for this. There will be a reckoning.