From: "Jason Blevins" Date: Sun Sep 20, 1998 01:33:50 US/Pacific To: Cc: Subject: [CRS] Cirran Logic In accordance with her policy of "Parresia", the Goddess has authorized the release of the following information regarding the existence of Cirran Logic, an information technology research laboratory located in the vicinity of Cirra. Cirran Logic develops specialized semiconductor components and software employed by the Goddess and her minions in a variety of mission-critical applications. Cirran Logic has recently introduced a new generation of microprocessors featuring native support for GCRCL (Goddess Cally's Robot Control Language) and HotLava virtual machines. Specific applications of Cirran Logic resources include: * Decryption of enemy parchments. * Strategic deployment of legions. * Real-time tracking and forecasting of enemy movements. * Combat simulations directed toward analyzing enemy tactics and developing countermeasures. * Development of optimal transportation matrices to determine the maximum amount of torment that can be inflicted on enemy forces prior to their ultimate destruction. * Implementation of the WWCD (What Would Callisto Do?) expert system that gives commanders in the field access to crucial Goddess knowledge and experience. * Reverse-engineering of captured Olympian technology. WARNING: Cirran Logic is a secure underground facility. The Goddess has authorized the use of deadly force to prevent her proprietary technologies from falling into enemy hands. The Goddess personally imposes severe penalties for trespassing on property overlying the Cirran Logic facility. The least popular of these penalties is having your entrails forcibly removed and set on fire before your eyes. Although this punishment may seem barbaric, keep in mind that you *are* permitted to voluntarily remove your own entrails and set them on fire yourself, but studies have shown that few people are capable of completing this procedure unaided. Since the exact boundaries of the Cirran Logic facility are highly classified, the citizens of Cirra are discouraged from wandering outside known safe areas. If you should become lost in an unfamiliar place, you should immediately fall to your knees and begin praying to the Goddess. Eventually you will be transported to an undisclosed location for inquisition. It is imperative that you remain calm and answer all questions truthfully and politely, no matter how personal or embarrassing the queries might be. If the Goddess suspects you of trying to infiltrate the facility, she will almost certainly grant your wish by assigning you to serve as a test subject in the Cirran Logic robotics lab, a fate similar to death. Callisto themiskreon aionios pandoxia! Jason Blevins (PiRho) Project Director, Cirran Logic jasonjwb@ix.netcom.com http://pw2.netcom.com/~jasonjwb ============================================================================== Web site copyright (c) 2001 Kevin C. Wong, All Rights Reserved. "Xena: Warrior Princess" and some material copyright MCA/Universal. Materials copyright their respective authors. Send questions and comments to me, Kevin C. Wong (jahn@csua.berkeley.edu) This page last updated: June 11, 2001.