From: Wight@axl.be (Wight)
Date: Thu Apr 01, 1999  12:33:49  US/Pacific
To: hudsonleick@onelist.com
Subject: [hudsonleick] CRS: Reception for new member ...
Reply-To: hudsonleick@onelist.com

From: Wight@axl.be (Wight)


Heya,

This is for ShwGess or whatever your name was (sorry, I don't exactly
recall but it was a toughie ... :). Since no one else has stepped
forward and given you that reception you wanted, I figure I might as
well stop serving as an assassin for a little while and help the new
visitors feel right at home ... <veg> .... No really, ....

________________________________________________________

<SCENE: ShwGess is standing on a high barren mountain, overlooking a
simple, beautiful town lying in a valley below. A visitor, somewhat
reminiscent of a forest rat, stands at the town's gates and receives a
very warm reception from two gorgous women in uniforms ... >

SH: Wow, that seems like a good play to stay for a while. I might even
hang my hat there.

<Grabbing his bag .... errrm, or should that be her bag, hmm .... >

---------pauze----------

DISCLAIMER: Since I don't know if you're a man or a woman, I'm just
going to use *he/his* in this skit ...

<Wight watches all the angry female looks>

Errr, I mean use *she/hers* ...

<Wight watches all the angry male looks>

Errr, welll, I could always use *it*. .... Hmm, then again, unless you
are a really hardcore feminist, that might even be worse ...

---------unpauze--------

<Grabbing his bag, ShwGess takes off and walks down the mountain.
However, it is already evening by the time he reaches New Cirra, and
unlike what he saw earlier, there is absolutely no one dare to welcome
him ... >

SH: <waits>

SH: <waits some more>

SH: This isn't right ...

SH: <waits>

SH: <getting bored>

SH: I feel cheated ...

SH: <waits>

SH: <having vines grown over his body>

SH: That's it, I'm out of here ... <SH turns around and begins to walk
away, when suddenly someone, or rather, something, appears. To his
surprise, a human sized armor-wearing skeleton runs up to SH>

W: <panting> Wait !!! I'm here ...

SH: Who are you ??

W: I'm your welcoming commitee !!

SH: What about the two ladies ??

W: Errr, we'll meet them later.

SH: Ok, cool. So where do we go. I need an inn to stay, and I'd like
to visit the temple. And I saw there was a large airport here, and a
lot of stores, and ...

W: The graveyard.

SH: What ?!

W: That's where we go first, the graveyard.

SH: Why ?

W: Hey, are you doing this tour or am I ?

SH: Not sure that either one of us is doing it. 

W: Trust me, you'll love it there. Oh, my name is Wight by the way. 

SH: ok.

<Wight turns around, starts walking away from Cirra, towards the
graveyard that is located just outside of town. ShwGess, shaking his
head, follows ... >

..........

<A little later, ShwGess finds himself entering a dark and dusty tomb,
full of cowebs and little eecky bugs. After walking through a unlit
passageway, he enters the heart of the tomb, where a stone coffin and
what appears to be a butcher's table stand.>

SH: Yikes, what is this place. Why are you taking me here ?

W: <evil grin> All part of the reception. Why don't you sit down, so I
can present you the ... the welcoming surprise ?

SH: You guys have a surprise for me ? Oh, ... <getting all warm
inside>, you shouldn't have. <SH sits down on the only possible place,
the butcher's table ... >

W: Yeah, we are just too kind. In fact, why don't you close your eyes,
and lie down. 

SH: Oh, ok ... <SH closes eyes, everything goes dark>

<shuffle ... >

<insane giggle ... >

<shuffle ... >

<sound of metal ... >

<shuffle ...>

<sound of metal ??!!!!!! >

<SH opens eyes, just in time to see a rusty old blade speed towards
his neck. He dodges to the left, falls off the table and avoid sudden
death by less then an inch ... >

SH: What in Tartarus are you doing !!

W: Stand still !! This won't hurt much !!

SH: Why are you trying to kill me ??!!

W: I need more bodies. <Wight's start laughing insanely> I *always*
need more bodies ...

SH: <Avoids another sword strike, manages to run past Wight and get
out of the tomb as fast as his feet can carry him ... >

W: Wait !! You haven't had your surprise yet !! Trust me, it'll give
you a whole new perspective <maniacle laugh ... >

..........

<A little later, ShwGess finds himself back safely (well, more or
less), on the streets of New Cirra, where he accidentally runs into
another villager, Griller>

GR: Hey, watch it there. Where are you going in such a hurry. Hey, I
haven't seen you around, must be new ...

SH: <out of breath> ... danger ... insane skeleton ... big sword .....
attacked me ...

GR: Oh, I see you met Wight have you. <suddenly realizes something> Oh
no, he didn't pose as the welcoming commitee again just to lure you to
his tomb and try to turn you into one of his undead minions.

SH: <nods frantically>

GR: <shrugs> Oh yeah, he does that from time to time. He's rather
psychotic, you know, but hey, what can you do. It's nothing personal.
Most sane Cirrans ([ed: Yes, I will find one someday, you'll see ...])
avoid him. Even the Vicious Circle and Club pain know better then to
mess with him. 

SH: <blank stare>

GR: I suppose you could always try to get some revenge. Although, now
that he's the Goddess' assassin, that might not be such a good idea.

SH: But I almost died !!

GR: Oh well, in that case, there's really only one thing I can say ...

WELCOME TO NEW CIRRA.

(and may all your future days be as peaceful as the first ... )

______________________________________________________________

Just to make you remember that old saying: "Be careful what you ask
for ... " <g>

-Wight-

==============================================================================

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This page last updated: July 3, 2001.