kcw | ars magica
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From my original notes. [] are run-time additions.

Objective: This run is meant to be fun, not dangerous. As such, try to
humiliate the characters. Use props, make them sing, act it up.

Magic: Unless noted otherwise, all magical effects are of level (d5x10) effect. Add Penetration of (d5x10) for a total Penetration of (2d5x10). Duration is Season (which might not be in the rules).

Aura: There is no Aura in New Cirra.

[Language: Since New Cirra is a 20th Century idea, everybody speaks modern English. Much to my dismay, the Mages didn't have enough InMe or any real language skills. I should have let them use Latin, but nobody was all that high in Latin. German was the closest.]

Getting to New Cirra

Obstacle 1: DND-Type Magic Pools

Underwater passage splits into three tunnels (should be too far to swim back and warn the others).

Tunnel 1: Changes mage's clothes to a random color (MuTe).

Roll d20: 01. Red        11. Tye-Dye

          02. Orange     12. Maroon
          03. Yellow     13. Flourescent Green
          04. Green      14. Flourescent Yellow
          05. Blue       15. Flourescent Blue
          06. Indigo     16. Black
          07. Violet     17. White
          08. Puce       18. Polka Dots
          09. Charcoal   19. Striped
          10. Rainbow    20. Transparent

Tunnel 2: Change a physical characteristic of mage (MuCo).

Roll d10: 01. Voice      06. Legs
          02. Eyes       07. Ears
          03. Hair       08. Nose
          04. Skin       09. Mouth
          05. Arms       10. Body

Roll d10: 01-03. Good/Beneficial Effect
          04-09. Neutral to Bad Effect
             10. Very Bad Effect

Tunnel 3: Change a mental/magical characteristic of mage (MuMe/MuVi).

Roll d10:
  01. Animal Quality     06. Random Advantage/
                             Disadvantage

  02. Extra Spell        07. Read Minds
  03. Loss of Spell      08. Invisibility
  04. Extra Magic (Art)  09. Teleport
  05. Less Magic (Art)   10. Lightning

Obstacle 2. Wheel... of... Pain^h^h^h^hMisfortune

Sign says "Spin wheel to enter". Roll d10, after spin character is teleported to the other side.

01. "Get out of the Goddess' Wrath" card.

"Present to the Goddess before she Zaps you (but after she gets mad)". This'll be a hard one for the character to time correctly.


02. Character will be attacked by one of Autumn's pet rats, which drops out of the sky. Apply rat at an inopportune moment.


03. "Free can of Dr. Pepper" card.

"Present to the Goddess' bard or any Temple worker". [Effect: add 2 extra 0 fatigue levels to drinker. Fatigue lasts until used or 1 season passes].


04. Small rain cloud over character for the duration of the day. Comes and goes throughout the next season. Usually just sprinkles, but might rain lightly.


05. "Free emergency care" card.

"Rip up when needed". Summons Trancer and her two firemen, who will take 45 minutes to cure the bearer to full health. Character cannot be dead.


06. Bad luck. Double all non-spellcasting botch dice for next month. Botches should be funny & incoveniencing, not deadly.


07. "Free chocolate bunny" card.

"Present to Pandora at The Candy Shoppe".

  Roll d10:
    01-03. Milk chocolate

    04-06. Dark chocolate
    07-08. Bittersweet
    09-10. Unsweetened
  Roll d10:
    Even.  No extra effect

    01,03. Lose one fatigue level long term
           (until end of adventure)
    05,07. Gain one 0 fatigue level until end
           of adventure

       09. Roll again. Durations are 1 month
           instead


08. Character comes out covered in:
    Roll d5:  01. Chocolate syrup
              02. Cotton candy
              03. Melted marshmallow stuff
              04. Chili powder
              05. Skunk aroma

09. "Gift dispensation" card.

"Bearer doesn't have to bring an offering when visiting the Temple. One use."

10. Character can't see or hear Goddess, without magic intervention. This could annoy the Goddess.

Obstacle 3. Grogs Away!

Door leading to New Cirra. Anyone with no magic/faerie blood will be teleported back outside.

New Cirra

New Cirra and the Cirran Restoration Society is a shared world created by Melissa Monson and expanded by CRS members in the Hudson Leick Mailing List. Most CRS members are responsible for a particular project/business. See the current "CRS - Who's Who" list for what's in town.

Shops to get gifts for the Goddess:

Candy Shoppe (Pandora)
Kindling Gate Mall (Matt Peters)
Gyft Shoppe (Sherry)
Ye Olde Joke Shoppe (Tartan Terror)
Quotes from the Goddess: [Never got to use these]

Sweet Mother of Zeus!
Shut up you little pissant.
{SMACK on the head}
Pah-lease!
Tartarus!
Son of a Bacchae!
Bite me.

At the Temple:

Present: The Goddess, her bard Leicky, Cal the High Priestess, Lady Callisto the Faith Enforcer.

The Goddess sits on her throne (the dungeon chair from "Return of Callisto"). Leicky and Lady Callisto are on one side, Cal is on the other side of the Goddess. Leicky and LC are members of Club Pain, while Cal is a member of the Vicious Circle, think of them as (not so) secret societies.

The Goddess approves of strong warrior-types and will flirt with everyone, male or female. She acts like a spoiled brat and her mood changes are quick and unpredictable.

[It's just after Solstice so the Goddess is dressed up as Senticles and the others are dressed up as elves]

Events:
  • Leicky, LC, and Cal get into an argument about which group is better, which group can get the Slinky back, etc. The Goddess will stop them, violently.
  • Goddess asks the characters for help in getting her Slinky back. Materializes a Slinky so they know what hers looks like (she had a Gold Slinky). May get a distant look and start softly singing the Slinky Song.
  • Goddess materializes a can of Dr. Pepper and drinks some.
  • If characters look awful (from the 'Getting to New Cirra' section) the Goddess will comment on it. She may ask why they came that way. Leicky can explain about the tunnel to the faerie realms.
  • If the characters say they need grog help the Goddess will graciously volunteer Leicky, Lady Callisto, and Cal. ("No Goddess! Not the Giant Lizard!" "Quit your whining you little pissant. And to think you're my ______.")

[When the Goddess gets her presents she tries them out on her subjects (if the present is some sort of weapon). Since it's just after Solstice she will give gifts to the characters. Her gifts tend to be martial in nature so mages may find them inconvenient.]

Road to the Lizard's Lair

Obstacle 1. Lizard Bridge

A wooden rope bridge across a chasm. River of lava at the bottom.

"I thought that would have cooled off by now..."

4 Lizardmen with sword and shield guard the bridge. To get through the characters can: kill the lizardmen or sing the Slinky Song.

[The lizardmen are playing with their personal Slinkies]

Obstacle 2. Aerial Attack

Lizardmen in hanggliders bomb the party. Each balloon-bomb has a random content:

Roll d5: 01. Butter (melted)
         02. Salt
         03. Maple syrup
         04. Feathers
         05. Rocks (+10 damage)

They make 2 passes each.

Obstacle 3. Maze of the Lizotaur

The Lizotaur has a lizard's head and a man's body.

The maze is filled with traps [I had the characters hit 10 traps instead of going through the map]

Roll d10 for each trap:

  01. Teleport to Lizotaur    06. Arrow trap

  02. Teleport to exit        07. Butter trap
  03. Teleport to entrance    08. Salt trap
  04. Pit                     09. Syrup trap
  05. Net trap                10. Feather trap

[The Lizotaur is actually quite nice and a gracious host]

At the Giant Lizard's Lair

He's in a big cave. A large pile of Slinkies sit in one corner.

The Giant Lizard will try to eat any character who has had butter and salt poured on him. Maple syrup and feather characters will be totally ignored. Other characters are somewhere inbetween.

If the characters talk to the Giant Lizard, he says he wants a giant tub of buttered popcorn in return for the Gold Slinky. The characters can return to New Cirra with this message.

The Slinky Song

The Slinky Song. I got it off of a Slinky web site; they transcribed it from a WAV file. I think this is an early version of the song since the wording is different than I remember. The WAV file seems incomplete so I added the fourth stanza.

Slinky Song

Who walks a stair, without a care
It shoots so high in the sky.
Bounce up and down, just like a clown.
Everyone knows its Slinky.

The best present yet, to give or get
The kids will all want to try
The hit of the day, when you are ready to play
Everyone knows it's Slinky

It's Slinky, It's Slinky
for fun it's the best of the toys
It's Slinky, It's Slinky
The favorite of girls and boys

[It's Slinky, It's Slinky
for fun it's a wonderful toy
It's Slinky, It's Slinky
It's fun for a girl and a boy]

-=+=- The End -=+=-
Copyright (c) 1998 Kevin C. Wong
Page Created: November 28, 2003 Page Last Updated: November 28, 2003